Saturday, April 27, 2013

Momma Bear Rage

Ok.  I think we all know that I'm pretty liberal on a lot of different topics.

I read an article today on Mr. Conservative that a friend had posted.  Nasty, Weird and Sexist Liberal Cracks about Women.  I was pretty upset about some of them, to be entirely honest.

I should put it out there that people on both sides of the coin say some pretty horrible things.  There are hardcore liberals and hardcore conservatives that are cruel and completely out of line in the things that they say.  This is not confined to just one side, and there are days where I am ashamed of humanity...didn't these peoples parents teach them better than this?

The one that really got to me was a quote by Larry Flynt, talking about Sarah Palin.

“(Palin) did a disservice to every woman in America. She knew from the first month of pregnancy that kid was going to be Down’s Syndrome. It’s brain dead. A virtual vegetable. She carries it to all these different political events against abortion, she did it just because she didn’t want to say she’d had an abortion. How long is it going to live? Another 12, 15 years? Doesn’t even know it’s in this world. So what kind of compassionate conservative is she? I don’t think anybody will want her near the White House.” — Larry Flyn

 I don't like Sarah Palin.  I don't agree with her politics and every time I've seen an interview with her, she annoys the hell out of me.  I just...don't like her.  But it's her politics that I don't like.  This goes way, way beyond that and way beyond acceptable.

First, let's look at the fact that no one knows in the first month of pregnancy that their child will have Down's Syndrome.  Yes, maternal age is a factor, but it's not the only one.  There is no way of knowing about the disability until later on in the pregnancy.  Some tests can be run between 11 and 13 weeks, but definitive results often come later than that.

Second, children with Down's Syndrome oftentimes live full and happy lives.  They can regularly live into their 50's and 60's.  Trig is a little boy.  He's not an 'it' and he's not brain dead and he's not a vegetable.  He is a sweet little boy who just happens to have an extra chromosome.  Unfortunately, he's got a famous political family.

Larry Flynt is an asshole.  That's a horrible thing to say.  You know what, I'm sure he'd never say that about someone else's child.  He wouldn't go up to a mother on the street with her child with Down's Syndrome and say, 'Hey!  How old is it?  You know it's not going to live to be an adult, right?'  You know why?  Because that is a horrible thing to say to a parent and is likely to get you kicked or stabbed.  He said it because he hates Palin because they are on different sides of the political spectrum.

That is not ok.  I don't care who you are or what your politics are or how much they may differ, it is not ok to attack someone on a personal level when you disagree with their politics.  Is Palin so politically perfect that you can't find something about her policies and her political beliefs that you can disagree with and attack?  Are you so pathetic that you have to resort to attacking her family--not just her family, her very young, disabled son?

Once again, I don't like Sarah Palin.  I would never vote for her, and politically I think she's pretty terrible.  But as a mother, I respect the hell out of her and her husband.  They made the decision to keep their son despite his disability.  Down's Syndrome is not easy to live with.  The degree of disability varies wildly from children who are able to function at normal levels to children who are never able to talk or walk.  No one knows how severe it will be, and it's a lot more than the 18 years that most parents sign up for with their children.  I can't even imagine how hard it would be...or how fulfilling.

And her family made the choice to keep the baby.  Many don't.  There are many people who abort fetuses with Down's Syndrome.  I may not respect the woman when it comes to politics, but as a mother, I understand.  I spent much of my pregnancy with Roland worrying about something going wrong.  I wouldn't have loved him any less, though.  But still, this is a hard decision to make.

What Larry Flynt probably doesn't bother to think about is the fact that any parent who receives this diagnosis spends hours agonizing over the decision.  The internet is full of information and it's easy to find out all about the disability that your child will be born with--the good and the bad.  Parents know that their child has a shortened life span.  They understand the possibility that their child may never be like a 'normal' baby.  You really think they don't get that?  Hell, Flynt has kids of his own...you think he'd understand.

This is disgusting, people.  This shit has to stop.  Attack the politics.  Attack the policies.  Hell, attack the personality.  Stop attacking the family.  This goes for the First Lady, Sasha and Malia, AND the Palin kids.  Don't call Bristol a whore, don't call Trig a vegetable.  It's not hard.

As a mother--hell, as a human being--I am horrified that we treat one another this way.  I know that when you sign up for politics you are signing up for a certain level of scrutiny.  The same applies for your family.  And it's expected that there will be a certain level of questioning and scrutiny and maybe even a few casual jokes flying around.  But this is unacceptable.

In 20 years, Trig Palin is going to read this shit online.  He's going to see things that were said about him and his family, and he's going to understand these things.  And you should be ashamed of yourself.

See this?  This is a sweet little boy who loves his daddy, who has a disability but isn't defined by it, who has a beautiful smile and is very obviously not a vegetable.  This is pulled off Sarah Palin's official facebook page.


So if you want to attack a politician, attack the politician.  Leave their damn families out of it.  This is not me defending Sarah Palin.  This is me, as a mother, feeling an insane amount of Momma Bear rage for a sweet little boy who could be ANYONE'S little boy who is being cruelly mocked.  You may not like the woman, and that is your right.  But at the very least, she deserves your respect for making a difficult choice.  It might not be the choice you made, but it was her choice.

Oh, and for the people who are pro-choice and are angry that she choose to keep Trig...isn't that the definition of choice?  The Palin family made the CHOICE to keep the baby that they knew would have life long disabilities.  Good for them.  From that sweet picture, I think they probably made the right one.


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